Ronald McDonald urges inhabitants of McDonaldland to avoid further meetings with Michael Lowry

Ronald McDonald urged his peers Grimace, Mayor McCheese and the other inhabitants of McDonaldland to avoid further meetings with Michael Lowry in the wake of the Moriarty tribunal after information relating to a meeting between the independant and TheĀ Hamburglar in early April.

“Even though both Lowry and Denis O’Brien feel they have been wronged, I still think it is in our best interests to respect the tribunal’s findings and disassociate the good name of McDonalds with individuals like Lowry” stated the McDonald spokesclown in a press call delivered from a big red and yellow striped car parked outside the Grafton street branch of the restaraunt. “It’s just inappropriate” he said, before waving in fast-forward and driving around in circles, honking his horn and leaving in a cloud of red striped smoke.

“Yes the meeting took place”, said Lowry, referring to the Apr 4th meeting between himself and The Hamburglar at his Tipperary business and constituency offices . “But I was simply facilitating a meeting between a friend at FoodCo, a local distribution outfit that handles the Irish McDonalds contract, including delivery of it’s burger meat, pickles and buns. The Hamburglar was very pleased with the outcome of the meeting and said he had made some valuable contacts & gleaned useful information, including employee names and addresses, as well as delivery times” said Lowry. “It’s all about my constituents and so on” he added, lylingly.

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