Reilly made ‘fart’ sounds, pulled hair, snapped bra claims Shorthall

Reilly: Drew image of Shorthall on his bag showing a huge rear end and emiting stink lines

Allegations of taunts, bullying & childish behaviour on the part of Health minister James Reilly have been made by Roisín Shorthall in the ongoing war of words following the junior health minister’s resignation on Wednesday last. Both Fianna Fáil and the Labour/Fine Gael government have subsequently engaging in teeth-baring, mudslinging and finger-pointing in support of their respective sides, as Labour defend their poor resignation record and Fianna Fáil call for Reilly’s resignation.

“Earlier this year, as I made a speech on my proposed alcohol bill, I could hear James Reilly making farting sounds on the palm of his hands and laughing at me” claimed Shorthall. “Then another time he poked me with a compass from MY ministerial pencil-case. Even though I appealed to the Ceann Comhairle the incident seemed to go unchecked. Also he wrote on my bag and even told the other ministers that I scored TD Billy Kelliher” she stated.”He’s horrible, I hate him” she went on to add.

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Opposition TDs came out in force to support the former minister and party whip at a get together behind the bins in the car park at Leinster house where ministers drank energy drinks, conducted press interviews and listened to a new track by The Saturdays on their phones.

Tánaiste Eamon Gilmore, Taoiseach Enda Kenny and Reilly conducted a separate press hearing at Dublin’s Four Seasons Hotel where the back-biting and recriminations came thick and fast. “She was the one who said Billy Kelliher scored with Lucinda Creighton” said an excited Gilmore “and that I got my genitals stuck in a wide-mouth Lucozade bottle at an EU summit think-in. It’s not true, I’m sick of explaining it”.

“She only resigned to show off” added a frustrated Kenny. “Everyone knows she fancies James Reilly”

“Everyone’s saying it” he added.